Happy Passover!

What do you do with your issue of Paperbag?

Whenever I get the latest Paperbag issue in my email the first thing I do is scan through all the events for what is free/no cover. The second thing I do is then scan for what I'm actually willing to apply mascara to go attend. I wish my second list didn't stay shorter than my first list. 


Maybe I should start inviting guests to my Cave of Hermitage. Who likes board games?!

I kept making a "Ping!" sound as Tom explained how sperm use up their precious glucose when they reach body temp in anticipation of "Show Time!"

This morning's drive-time conversation was started with an informative discussion/lecture by Tom about dog balls.

Good Morning, Campers!

The Standoff from Tom

Text Messages From The Edge

I tested out posting blog updates from my phone while on a day trip to Louisiana.  

10:08 AM 

Today is brought to you by the 112th installment of "Adventures Taking Mom to Her Out-of-Town Medical Appointments" Expect several text messages from The Edge.

11:25 AM

I'm napping in the back of the car while Mom drives and Tom entertains with stories. Mom steers using a modified swerving technique. Tom is my Canary in The Mine, if he starts screaming I know I need to brace myself for the impact.

3:33 PM

Have you ever heard anyone say, "Those two couldn't find their way out of a paper bag with a map and written directions"?

3:37 PM

Now we're on our way back to Mississippi. I'm laying down in the back of the car again in order to keep the naked fear and horror off my face. Again.

One day of practice has not made me an expert at phone blogging but I think I'm starting to get the hang of it. Thankfully, we made it back in more or less same pieces that we left in. Excuse me while I go off to find my happy place or at least somewhere without any swerving or honking.

Happy Burrow Day!

When Cassi started celebrating Burrow Day this morning by trying to burrow back under the covers of my freshly made bed, my brother Tom chuckled at her antics. "What's so funny, Tom?" I asked. "Cassi just got out of bed a little while ago and already she wants to get back in." He replied. "Cassi's celebrating Burrow Day in the traditional manner by staying under the covers, of course." I further explained.

In a skeptical tone Tom asked me to explain Burrow Day.

Burrow Day is the day when all the little baby dachshund puppies burrow into holes so all the little baby badgers can bait them out. All the baby dachshunds and all the baby badgers have a great time playing this game back and forth all day. And all the grown-up dachshunds stay under the covers in their homes in celebration of this great holiday. It's a big holiday in the dachshund world.

Tom still doesn't believe me and I don't understand his surprising religious intolerance. Oh well, to each their own.

And to all the little baby dachshund puppies and all the little baby badgers, Happy Burrow Day, you little rascals!

Here's a picture of Cassi during her Burrow Day celebration.

Will Tom Hanks & Stephen Colbert be starring in "No Dingos At the Mall?"

 &   

Tom Hanks needs to make a zany comedy with Stephen Colbert. I realize that no one likes Tom Hank's zany comedies except me, his wife Rita and 6 people from Ohio but it's been over a decade perhaps even two decades since the last one. It's time!

I miss the ridiculousness of such diamonds in the rough as "Volunteers," "Bosom Buddies," "Splash," "The Money Pit," and my favorite bit of over-the-top humor disguised as Res Ipsa Loquitur: "Joe Versus the Volcano."

I need a new movie in the spirit of "Some Like It Hot" and "A Flea in Her Ear." The market is over run with incipient dramas and intellectual comedies. I need some earnest silliness with a warm but lighthearted ending.

Perhaps what I'm really saying is I need to see handsome, intelligent, funny men wearing dresses and/or talking in silly voices running around possibly even slamming doors.

Please say that the days of those kind of Saturday matinee flicks aren't over. Pretty please with sprinkles?

Verna

For my siblings, start at 3:54 and watch for approx. 1 minute.

Or watch the entire hilarious episode. :D

The J'accuse part is great, too.

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